Here I sit at the beginning of the cool, fall days that will soon line themselves up like dominos. Only one week into this year's homeschooling journey and already the anxiety and energy that always seems to plague me during this season has started to wash over me. I promised myself that this year would be different and that we would spend the days reading and enjoying our time together but how can I compete with SUMMER! I was so ready, so excited, so optimistic and yet, my children, struggle against the structure and the expectations and the work. It's hard for me to be not to be a little hurt that they seem to be missing IT!
I spend all summer planning, plotting and learning my craft. As Fall approaches and daily shipments of books and supplies arrive I grow more excited for the "unwrapping" of a new school year. I can't wait to share with the kids all I have learned and all they will learn during the next nine months. The day arrives and I announce cheerful that today we will be starting school but that this year will be more fun and different and delightful than any year that has come before! I guess they know me better than that because groans, and growls, and tears come quickly to their little beings. Oh, the devastation, for me! Why does it have to be such a bitter pill, each and every year!
But I've been through this before. I know how this story ends. It takes a couple weeks of struggle and frustration not to mention a good deal of self-encouragement. This happens ever year, nothing really changes but I always wonder if we will be able to make it. Will I meet all of their needs emotional, academic, and most importantly spiritual? Will they grow up remembering their days of schooling with fondness or mostly their frustration at being ripped from summer to "play school with mom"? There are no guarantees I guess. I'll just have to wait as the heaviness of adult responsibilities begin to weigh an their minds to know for sure if they will look back and see the gift I gave them. I just have to trust in the vision I was given when I started this whole thing and remind myself to "stay the course." So as for today, this week, this year I guess that is what we are doing, staying the course. So Day 1, Week 1 is finished and so far so good!
